My Office Hero

Yes, Dogbert is my office hero. What's not to like about him? He threatens people with cardboard tubes and attacks a problem with C-4 plastique high explosive when only a shotgun is warranted. He openly ridicules the intelligence of inferior life forms to their face and exploits them when it becomes advantageous to do so. In regards to his call performance, the information and advice he provides is beyond reproach and more honest than a wife who calls her cheating private investigator husband Richard, Dick. His talk time is below one minute but his first call resolution rate is higher than everyone else's (they're too afraid to call back to complain, but that's not the point). And, as depicted, he casts out office demons. What's not to like? I have oft lived vicariously through his actions and, in honor of my work hero, years ago I bought a little plushy of him and sat him on my desk.

After I left the office back in '02 he went in a box that's been sitting in various closets from move to move until I recently unearthed him. Ah, the memories. The important part, though, is he's reclaimed his rightful place upon my desk, taking his thrown once again and returning to his righteous reign as Office Hero.