I was talking to someone the other day about Superman and my jaw dropped when a certain question came up. I'll paraphrase the conversaion below (names have been changed to protect the guilty):
Me - It's alright, I'm like Superman, made of steel!
Johnson - Yeah, okay.
Me - Ha ha.
Johnson - So does Superman wear a cup?
Me - Um, wut?
Johnson - Well, I mean he's got the perfect package [note - lest there be any confusion, this is refering to the way Superman's penis is shaped in his tights, not Superman's recent UPS shipment of pez dispensers].
Me - What the HELL are you looking at THAT for?
Johnson - Well, he does! It's like perfectly proportional to his body! Nobody has a penis like that without a cup.
Me - No, he doesn't wear a cup! Why the hell would he need a cup? He's made of STEEL!
Johnson - No, I'm sorry. I don't care, if he gets hit there he's gonna crumble like a bitch unless he's wearing a cup just like any other guy.
Me - Dude, no. You don't know what you're talking about. His only weakness is kryptonite, not kryptonite and his nuts.
Johnson - I'm tellin' you, it would at least hurt a little bit.
Me - Whatever. I don't wanna talk about this any more.
*sigh* Every time I think about this conversation it makes me sad. I was never really a huge fan of comic books but now I REALLY don't want to read them - I'm too afraid that I'll open one up to a page where Superman is punching some dude's lights out and instead of "POW!" it says "WANG!"
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I wonder if Superman is ticklish. It has nothing to do with stength and it can still be a weakness.
- Enrique
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