The results are in!

Probably the best football weekend so far...

Ohio State won
Michigan Lost
Notre Dame won
ASU won
Peoria won
My fantasy teams won 2 and lost 1

6-2 overall this weekend.

Ohio State and Arizona State each had the ballgames won in the first half - impressive! And the Badgers of Wisconsin became my new favorite team by beating Michigan and knocking them out of the polls for the first time in quite a while (may the Wolverines rot and die).

Hey Taz, I've got an idea for OU's QB situation - American Quarterback, where the audience decides! :-)

And for the record, it's raining in Arizona right now. Good times!

A good day (the 72-hour kind)

I arrived at work yesterday to find caution tape and crepe paper (the pink kind) wrapping my office and gifts lining my desk. I figure it's a good sign when your employees think enough of you to tease you on your birthday weekend, although the caution tape may have been a legitimate warning to any passers-by that happened through the department. A princess then stole me away for a few minutes to sing me a song and present me with cake and candles (of which only a few were lit, but I didn't care...it was cool, and they were the only cakes and candles I got).

Today I watched college football (a great day, might I add - but more on that tomorrow) and went bowling with a lot of old acquaintences. I got to talk with Sue-in-a-bottle, a dear former coworker of mine, and did something I haven't done in my entire life - converted a 6-7-10 split. It was quite the exciting moment, and the only one converted all day to the knowledge of the employees. After that I came home to watch more football before venturing off to the other side of the valley to have barbequed meat served to me at the local churrasco. If you enjoy meat and you've never been to one, you should be ashamed of yourself. My first experience with one was a 2.5 hour long sitting at Samba in the Mirage Las Vegas - probably the best first churrasco experience one could possibly have. The local one here had great food, just was missing the ambience. Anyway the list was incredible...tilapia, salmon, chicken breast, chicken legs, lamb, sausage, ham, filet mignon, top sirloin, prime rib, bacon-wrapped turkey...mmmmm. Meat, fire, and an incredibly cute hostess - quite possibly the most physically-attractive woman I've ever seen in my life. Greg, if you're reading this, she beats all the cute PF Chang's hostesses we've seen COMBINED. And then I had their chocolate mousse...sweet mercy, so good!

I'm gonna watch a movie now, then pass out, sleep in tomorrow, maybe have some margaritas at Applebees, maybe buy something electronic, watch more football...birthdays don't get too much better! All that's missing is a good woman and I'm golden! :-)

Bliss in a chair

I tend to do a lot of work at my computer. I work at home sometimes. I talk to you all. I write articles. I do research. I sleep (there's been more than one night with QWERTY across my face). With all that, you want a comfortable chair.

I haven't been using a comfortable chair for quite some time. My butt and back have hurt a lot. I'm sure you wanted to know that.

A couple months ago I was leaning back in my perfectly comfortable chair and heard something of a crack - never a welcomed sound. In my mind, I knew that sound meant certain doom if I leaned back in my chair one more time, yet the laws of idiocracy compelled me to throw my weight backwards as I have so many times before, half expecting to lean back as normal, the other half expecting to be impaled by the steel that connects the back to the cushion.

The latter half won, sans the impaling (whew). It was a good chair... *tear* Only $50, but it lasted me years, had a great cushion, good back support, and great lean. I lean back in my chair, so that's quite important. I lean. It's what I do.

Since that fabulously awkward moment I've been using some leftover piece of crap chair that mom brought home from her old job. Barely any cushion, squeaky, strangely shaped back, and NO LEAN! I'm surprised I didn't just chuck it out the window. Just the other day I saw my chair on sale for $50 again, so I went out and snagged it. Thank goodness for machine parts! It feels just like the old one...a little firmer cushion, a little stiffer lean, but it's definitely the same chair. Who knew $50 could buy you bliss?

That's all for now. I have to get back to work. I'm leaning.

Bloody Pooh Bear, and another bummer weekend

There's someone at work...well, a couple of someone's, actually...that are going to challenge my workplace cunning. Or so they say. Evidently they think it'd just be the bees knees to mess with my desk and such at work, as my desk is too organized for their liking. Yes, I'm organized. No, I'm definitely not OCD. I told them that they don't frighten me, which is entirely true. I've gone up against far worse than them and come out unscathed. Not even Princess Pino and her unruly gang of knaves could scar me! They asked what made me so confident, at which point I relayed my Pooh Bear incident.

Pino and her lackey Michele stole my smiley figurines and Daunte Culpepper. I said we'd get them back, they said we wouldn't. So I resorted back to an old addage - kill them with kindness. That night I went out and purchase a pooh bear stuffed animal, a large Disney gift bag, and a smaller white box with some tissue paper. Michele was a big Disney fan, so I figured she'd never suspect anything unseemly. I then went home and ripped pooh's head off, painted the stuffing red, jammed it on a pike, and wrapped it in tissue paper for Michele. I then painted the top of the body red and put it in the box to be delivered to the Princess later the same day.

It worked to perfection - Michele saw the bag, was delighted, and opened it with glee only to find Pooh's head on a pike, holding up the stick for all to see. It was great! Then the body was delievered to complete the day. Good times! Everyone in the department knew I was weird, but then they thought I was a psycho. Nobody messed w/me again. :-)

And for the record...

OSU won...
Michigan didn't lose...
Notre Dame lost...
ASU won...
Peoria lost (0-3 for the first time ever...sad, sad days)...
All my fantasy teams lost...

2-6 for the weekend. *sigh* Shameful and saddening.

Fan 2, Idiots 0

A couple of years ago I went to help my friend install a new ceiling fan in his house (he was remodeling before they actually moved in). Allow me to set the stage somewhat...

- My dad is disabled and wasn't able to show me how to work on anything, so all my building/mechanical skill comes from reading directions, trial, and error. I can change my oil in my car, change belts, and change tires. I can also put together complete home gyms and such. Not much else beyond that. I absolutely abhore yardwork, but I know how to install sprinkler systems (hell, I helped installed a small city's entire water system - not a lie). I'm not electrically inclined, but I know enough that red goes to red, black goes to black, green goes to ground, and blue goes to I have no idea.

- My friend likes power tools. A lot. And likes to use them whenever he can. He acts similar to Tim the Toolman Taylor, but he has maybe 1/3rd the know-how. So combine mechanical power with ignorance, and...yeah.

So anyway, we go to install this fan. He takes is Ryobi power drill and some screws and starts going to town. I look at the directions, then look up at what he's doing; I immediately see that there's *no* way we're going to be able to install this fan. He doesn't have the installation box installed to the frame, instead electing to try to mount the fan straight to the drywall/ceiling. I try to tell him this won't work. He drills another hole so as to say, "This just worked." I think about trying to explain to him that a 15-20 pound fan won't stay secured to dry wall by two screws, but instead I just climb the ladder and drill a hole - may as well join in the fun, right? Then he goes to start working with the electrical connections, and I notice the switch is still on.

"Joe, you turn off the circuit?"

"No. Switch is off."

"Joe, don't touch that wire."

"Why? The switch is off."

"Uh, the other switch is on."

A few watts and a tingling sensation in his fingertips later, we turned off the circuit.

And the fan didn't stay up (duh).

Fan 1, Idiots 0.

So yesterday he moved out of the house he spent three months remodeling and lived in for a little over a year to a different house on four days' notice. One of the new tasks was none other than installing a ceiling fan. By this time he's seen his father-in-law - a *highly* industrially-inclined individual - install a few ceiling fans and figures he knows what he's doing now. And for some reason I figure he knows what he's doing now, too. Turns out I'm right. This time we turn off the circuit, he matches the wires right, installs into the right area...things go well. Until we notice that the mouting plate is mangled. The welded one mounting bolt at an angle so we have to bang that over with a hammer. Not a problem. They melted a second mounting bold so the tip is 1/8th inch to wide and stripped/warped. Problem. We tried to install it anyway, figuring two bolts might be enough. We figured wrong. Fan blades scraped. Project blown, time wasted. Fan wins again.

Fan 2, Idiots 0.

I'm gonna destroy the next ceiling fan I see that isn't attached to a ceiling.

My kids were needy today

I manage a group of about 23 people for a major credit union here in Arizona. And they're kinda like kids. I get them when they're young, build them up, teach them how they should do things, and inevitably they run off in their own directions to succeed or fail as they will.

Right now, 2/3 of my staff are what I could consider newborns-toddlers. And they were needy.

I have no children of my own (not complaining...there's time enough for them later), but I assume that my experience today was something like that of a parent chasing aroudn a room full of 2-4 year olds. Seperating those that aren't getting along. Helping people see what they did wrong and teaching them a better way. Apologizing to those parents of others that were wronged. Feeding them. And pleading for just a moment of silence to yourself in between putting out fires and trying to clean things up around the house.

Yeah. These are adults I'm talking about. And I'm in charge of them...wow...weird.

In spite of the tiring/stressful day, I enjoy what I do and I pretty much always have. Only once have I had a job that I couldn't figure out how to leave it at work and illicited swearing; when I noticed myself reacting like that, I knew it was time to go. But in pretty much everything I've done, the common thread has been growing up a group of people to be successful...teaching, coaching, youth work, managing, squad/fire team leader...I enjoy that. Taking a group of people and training them so they can be successful. My job isn't glorious, nor is it the best job in the world. But I like what I do, and in that regard I count myself blessed.

Even if it does mean cleaning up after 24 year old toddlers.

A rough weekend

Well, lets see.

Peoria (my old h/s football team) lost in the fourth.
Arizona State lost in the fourth.
Ohio State lost in the fourth.
The Arizona Cardinals lost all day long.

The only team that lost that I *wanted* to lose was Michigan, which always brings a smile to my face. Ohio University beat Pitt, too; while I don't really care about Ohio U so much, it was a heck of a game. The ASU/LSU game was incredible, too. I was there in section 208 on the 35 yard line...much fun. I just wish whoever was calling the plays for ASU that game wasn't a certifiable moron. Larry Fitzgerald got popped somethin' fierce in the Cards game this afternoon. In fact, he got hit so hard that his helmet flew off...I'm just glad his head wasn't in it when the helmet came off.

I'm glad that football is back in full swing, make no mistake. Wish a few more of the games would have gone my way, though.

I'll just take it out on my employees tomorrow :-)

Cheers to the gamerfolk

I recently found out that another friend of mine was laid off by a game/accessory company. Shortly thereafter I read that another high-profile volunteer resigned from my old corps. As one friend had his destiny handed to him and another chose it, I just wanted to honor those that I've met and worked with over the past couple of years in the industry...a "thank you" to those who have fed my addiction, so to speak.

Decipher - They gave me my first experiences in the industry. Some incredible people working incredibly hard.

Rook - They make the best damn deck boxes around!

Joyride - My new pimp. Quite a fine cast they've put together, and a product to match.

Wizkids - A neat gaming company I very nearly threw my volunteer efforts to.

Bandai - I worked hand in hand with these guys at times. Another company I almost shifted to.

WOTC - They may be the Evil Empire, but where would we be without them?

So three cheers to the gamerfolk!!! Here's to good friends and new opportunities! See you at the next con...

Teams I like, Teams I don't

Like...

1. Ohio State. I'm a Buckeye, born and raised in Columbus, OH. There is no other school greater than Ohio State, and anybody who knows anything in Columbus knows this. It is an incontrivertable fact of life (unlike my spelling).
X. Arizona State. My family moved to AZ in the early 80's. Been living in the Phoenix area ever since. Go Devils!
X. Notre Dame. Fun for me to watch...I enjoy following the independent teams, and ND plays a hell of a schedule every year. That's the reason I followed Penn State, too (until they joined the Big Ten that can't count).
X. Florida State. It seems to me you have to like one of the three big Florida schools. I can't stand Miami and its cockiness and when I was forming my opinions Spurrier was coaching Florida and running up the score in the 4th which I disagree with. So FSU it is.

There's others that I like/pull for, but these are the ones at the forefront of my mind.

Those that I don't like...
1. University of Michigoboom. The name that I dare not speak. The root of all evil. The spawn of Satan. Nothing good comes from Ann Arbor (as far as I'm concerned Tom Brady jumped straight to the pros from high school). Directions to Ann Arbor from Columbus...north 'till you smell it, west 'till you step in it. I could go on and on.
2. University of Arizona. Slightly less hated than Michigan since they're ASU's rival.
Y. University of Miami. Your mascot is a hurricane, yet an Ibis (or is it a crane) represents you? And you have a giant U on your helmet. Where the filth does that come in. Oh, and they're a bunch of cocky SOBs. I know, I know, Ohio State often has had thugs coming out of there. But I'm from there, which forgives a lot (not murder...I live in Arizona, but Lauren Wade murdered my friend and fellow teammate. F that.).
Y. Tennessee. Because they owned OSU during the 90s. Then again pretty much every top 10 team owned OSU during the John Cooper era. He was a hell of a recruiter, but he couldn't motivate a team to beat a jr. high girls flag football team if they were ranked in the top 10. And their mascot is a volunteer, which strikes not a bit of fear into me whatsoever.
Y. Texas, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Oklahoma St, and the Big 12 in general. Because they're genrally good, and they generally end up beating my teams at the worst times. And I don't like their colors and/or mascots (or in Texas' case, both). And they usually take the TV slots when I'd rather see other teams. And I still think that Auburn would have given USC a better game last year, although I think USC would have won either game. And I still think Penn State should have been the champ back in 94/95 when Nebraska somehow bested them. But whatever.

Folks, that's part of what makes college football/sports great...passionate fans for no other reason than "Just cuz, and up yours!" I know that Ohio State isn't the best at everything, and a lot of times they're not even good or likeable, but I'll root for them until I'm in the grave, then I'll root for them some more as I kick Bo Schembechler and Lloyd Carr in the junk.

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

FOOTBALL SEASON!!!

The college season kicked off this weekend, and a hell of a weekend of football it was. ASU kicked ass (yeah!), Ohio State kicked ass (yeah!), OU lost (yeah!), FSU won (yeah!), and Michigan won (may they all forget how to procreate). Some great plays this weekend, including NC State's double-lateral final play, even though it didn't work.

Oh, and in case you missed it, true freshman Keegan Herring, a fellow Peoria Panther, ran for over 130 yards and a TD in his first collegiate game ever, averaging over 10 yards a carry. I hear that kind of performance will win you some awards if you do it over and over again (freshman awards, not the Heisman...I don't think he's *that* good, but if he is, BONUS!).

This weekend was also draft weekend for fantasy football. I'm doing three leagues this year...two of which I have a good shot at finishing top three, the other I'll need a bit of luck as I always do. The guys in that league are all seasoned veterans, but none of them puts in the preparation like I do. Hours of calculations and formulas, hours of strategizing...it's great! Too bad the season takes 22 weeks but the draft only takes a couple hours :-(

A league can never be won in the draft, but it CAN be lost.

Ah, football! Shannon, eat your heart out!